AAE -- Wishes Of The Heart

Chapter 94

written by LoveCR2 -- 2005

edited by All-About-AAE -- 2017

 

"This isn't some romantic fantasy you're living, Sun-Mi. It's not the next life that matters now, only this one!" -- Jo Cho-Jeh

 

 

PLAZA ON THE RIVER, CENTRAL LONDON...

 

"... Jin Sun-Mi, I'm trying really hard not to be jealous!!..."

 

Mobile to her ear, still in her sleep shirt, Sun-Mi listens to her friend's complaint as she pours her first cup of coffee for the morning.

 

Cho-Jeh goes on sarcastically, "You had two Prince Charmings propose marriage! Were you expecting three maybe?"

 

 

A frown on her face, Sun-Mi walks from the kitchen of her apartment to the living room, where she curls up onto the couch with her coffee and phone, drawing her bare legs up underneath her. "Will you stop joking? This is serious!" she grumbles.

 

"Okay... let me get this straight," Cho-Jeh tones down her attitude. "First you turned down Director Yoon, and last night you rejected Min-Cho's proposal, too?"

 

Sun-Mi tiredly makes the correction, "I didn't actually refuse Min-Cho yet, only asked him to wait until I figure things out."

 

"But won't that be awkward, with you two living together?"

 

"For the last time, we're NOT living together, we're just sharing the same apartment," Sun-Mi impatiently draws the distinction again. "Anyway, it's not an issue, since Min-Cho agreed to stay at his uncle's until I leave for New York."

 

"So... how is the 'figuring things out' going?"

 

"Miserably," Sun-Mi admits. "I'm so confused what to do, I'm thinking to not marry at all, and join Young-Mi at the convent..."

 

"Who's joking now?" Cho-Jeh charges. Then unsure, she asks worriedly, "Hey... you're not really serious, are you?"

 

"It's just that I'm frustrated," Sun-Mi sighs. "I've believed in True Love my whole life, and encouraged others to believe, too. But now... I'm wondering if there really is such a thing, if I'm giving up a chance for happiness by holding onto an impossible ideal..."

 

"Just so I understand, exactly what is it you feel you're giving up with Min-Cho?"

 

"How can I say it? ... He has a zest for life, a spirit for grasping� the moment and living it to the fullest, so that I feel like anything, and everything, is possible when I'm with him," she replies.

 

"But weren't you complaining to me about him all the time before?" Cho-Jeh wonders what has changed.

 

"Of course he's not perfect, but I have my faults, too, and he accepts me just as I am, which is something," Sun-Mi adds, and then sighs, "He treats me like I'm the most beautiful and desirable woman on earth... says some of the most touching and romantic things... and when he looks into my eyes and holds me, it's like..."

 

"Okay, enough," Cho-Jeh interrupts enviously. "I get the idea... Now, tell me again, why you aren't running to the altar with your latest Prince Charming? You have doubts?"

 

"I think I'd marry Min-Cho without a doubt in my mind, if only I hadn't met Senior first," Sun-Mi reflects on her feelings. "With Senior... even though we're from different worlds, somehow it's like we were made for each other, if I can use that clich�... He holds a place in my heart in a way that I can't imagine possible for anyone else."

 

"So if Director Yoon is your One True Love, why did you turn down his proposal? Where was the sense is that?" Cho-Jeh expresses her confusion.

 

"That's part of what is so bewildering," Sun-Mi shares her dilemma. "How can it be True Love, if it hurts others, by breaking up a family? How can I take happiness away from a mother and daughter, just to have it for myself?"

 

"So that's it? Nothing else?" Cho-Jeh expresses her skepticism, "And you're sure about that?"

 

"Yes," Sun-Mi confirms. "Although leaving Senior was, in one way, the hardest decision I've made, yet in another way it was also the easiest. I'm content I'm doing the right thing."

 

"Jin Sun-Mi, you're a total idiot!" Cho-Jeh explodes, and by her tone Sun-Mi can imagine her friend's eyes flaring. "Haven't you read the news lately?"

 

"I've been too busy getting ready for New York," Sun-Mi answers. "Why? Am I in another scandal again?"

 

"This isn't gossip," Cho-Jeh retorts, "but the truth... Park So-Won admitted to making up the entire story about Director Yoon and Mi-Rae. It turns out the girl was an adopted orphan," she fills Sun-Mi in on the recent developments.

 

Sun-Mi is stunned. "You mean, Senior isn't Mi-Rae's father?"

 

"That's right! So now there's nothing keeping you and Director Yoon apart," Cho-Jeh verbalizes what Sun-Mi is already thinking. "I thought he'd already have called to tell you."

 

"He won't," Sun-Mi sighs disconsolately. "We promised not to contact each other again... until our next lives..."

 

"What kind of crap is that?" Cho-Jeh bluntly dismisses the idea outright. "This isn't some romantic fantasy you're living, Sun-Mi. It's not the next life that matters now, only this one!"

 

"But I told him I was serious about marrying Min-Cho," Sun-Mi explains. "How can I go back now, and have any self-respect? I'd look like an idiot who doesn't know what's in her own mind."

 

"So what? The circumstances have completely changed," Cho-Jeh argues. "Aren't you free to change your mind, too?"

 

"I suppose so," Sun-Mi sees the reasoning. "It's not like I've haven't done that before..."

 

"The way I see it, better to be an idiot without self-respect, than a fool with regrets by failing to act when you had the chance," Cho-Jeh encourages her.

 

"Still, What if he already decided to move on, without me? Wouldn't I look desperate, trying to cling onto him?" Sun-Mi raises another possible roadblock.

 

"And what if he hasn't? Every day you wait gives some other woman a chance to snatch him away," Cho-Jeh argues. "Just make up an excuse to call, and if things go well, tell him how you feel and see what happens. What can it hurt?"

 

"You're right, what can it hurt except my pride?" Sun-Mi agrees with a renewed sense of determination, "Okay, I'll do it."

 

"Today?"

 

"Right now, before I talk myself out of it," Sun-Mi makes the firm commitment. "Call you later..."

 

Sun-Mi abruptly hangs up and stares at her mobile, building up courage, then makes the next call...

 

 

After three rings, a surprised voice answers amid a cacophony of rumbling engines, beeping car horns, and traffic splashing through water, " Hello? Sun-Mi?!..."

 

"Senior?" she replies, talking loudly through the noise. "I can hardly hear. Where are you?"

 

"I'm heading to an outside meeting," he informs her, "waiting for the traffic light to change."

 

"It sounds like it's raining. Do you have your umbrella? Your jacket? Be careful not to get splashed," she warns from experience...

 

... as she waited in a pouring rain to meet up with Woo-Jin, Hyung-Chul had appeared from nowhere ... just in time to shield her from being drenched by the splash of a passing bus ...

 

"Don't worry," he assures her good naturedly, so happy to hear Sun-Mi's voice that he doesn't mind being nagged like a child, as he recalls that chance meeting, too...

 

... when protecting her from the splash, for a fleeting moment fate had sent her into his arms ...

 

"It's hard to see at night with the rain," she continues to 'mother hen' him, overly cautious ever since Woo-Jin was killed by a truck in the street. "Always watch for the traffic, and remember, you can't be too careful... because..." Emotions prevent her from saying more...

 

"Because it's me?" he finishes her words. "I was hoping you still thought like that."

 

 

Sun-Mi can't believe what she just heard... "Then, you're not upset with me for breaking things off?"

 

"Baffled, but not upset," he replies, and asks hopefully. "But you didn't call just to talk about the weather, right?"

 

... if things go well, tell him how you feel and see what happens ...

 

"Senior, there's something important I have to tell you," she answers, taking a deep breath before continuing...

 

 

Immediately, the video he'd seen that morning -- Sun-Mi walking the red carpet with Min-Cho -- comes to mind...

 

"Is it about your promotion to New York?" he quickly speaks first, suspecting an announcement of her decision to marry Min-Cho. "Congratulations!"

 

"How did you know?" she asks, at first puzzled how he'd gotten the news so fast, then suspicious. "It happened only yesterday morning. Did you have something to do with it?"

 

"How could I? It was yesterday afternoon, around five, when I was talking with John White," he tries to convince her differently.

 

 

Out of habit, Sun-Mi automatically calculates the time difference, and suddenly realizes that Hyung-Chul had inadvertently just confirmed he'd talked with John White before her meeting with him...

 

"Then it was you!" she levels the accusation sharply. "I wondered why, as the youngest and least experienced, I got the position... How could you do that to me?"

 

"Sun-Mi, just listen for a moment..."

 

But with her irritation rising, she is done listening... "No wonder everyone was being so nice; they were all laughing behind my back! ... 'How did Sun-Mi get the job without any ability? Oh, that's why! She gets anything she wants from Director Yoon' ..."

 

He tries again, "It's not what you think..."

 

"When did you ever care what I think?" she retorts angrily. "It doesn't matter how hard I try, or what I accomplish, I'll never be good enough... you have so little regard for my ability that you have to step in and 'help' me! ..."

 

"That's not true!"

 

"The truth is, I thought by coming here I could succeed on my own, but now I'm just a laughingstock in London like in Seoul, all because of you!"

 

"You're wrong, Sun-Mi..."

 

"I was wrong to think that you might actually love me! But you've made it clear that I'm just an idiot... I... I hate you!" she lashes out in blind fury. "I never want to speak to your again!"

 

"Sun-Mi, please... don't be like thi..." The blaring of a loud car horn drowns out the rest of what he says.

 

"I'll be whatever I like!" she shouts to be heard over the clamor. "You can't tell me what to do anymo..."

 

 

She stops abruptly to listen for a moment, puzzled, and then realizes that the background noise is gone; the line is dead...

 

"How dare you hang up on me, Director Yoon!" she fumes as she immediately calls back. "I'm not done with you yet!"

 

But instead of connecting, Sun-Mi hears the computerized female voice of his mailbox ... I'm sorry, the number you are trying to reach is unavailable ... please call again later ...