AAE -- Wishes Of The Heart

Chapter 187

written by LoveCR2 -- 2005

edited by All-About-AAE -- 2018

 

"We've had our differences, been enemies, too... But we're sisters now... Let's stop fighting, and start helping each other." -- Jin Sun-Mi

 

 

SEOUL DETENTION CENTER, UIWANG ...

 

"The prisoner will arrive shortly, Ms. Jin..."

 

The guard addresses Sun-Mi as he presses the release button. A buzzing noise sounds, and the heavy, barred steel door automatically opens.

 

"Thank you," Sun-Mi replies with an uneasy smile.

 

"I'll be here if you need anything," he assures her.

 

 

Sun-Mi steps into the visiting room. Behind her, the door closes with a loud metallic clang, the sudden noise jarring. It is her first time to be in such a place, and she feels a bit creeped out...

 

... how long does it take a person to become used to this, and it becomes normal? ... she ponders the oppressive environment.

 

The room is unfurnished except for a small rectangular table and two chairs in the center. Sun-Mi slowly walks up to the table, her heel clicks on the hard concrete echoing off the bare, gray walls, and waits.

 

 

A minute later, another electronic buzzer sounds, and the door on the opposite side of the room opens.

 

Young-Mi appears in the doorway with a guard at her side. She is wearing a prison-issue light blue jumpsuit, with her hair pulled back into a tight ponytail. Her late-term pregnancy bulges under the stretch waistband of the jumpsuit. She steps into the visiting room and approaches the table, the flat soles of her plastic slippers padding dully.

 

The guard remains outside and presses the door control. This time, when Sun-Mi hears the door clang shut, she is expecting the sound and doesn't flinch.

 

 

"Hello, Young-Mi," Sun-Mi greets her with a forced casualness. Although Sun-Mi had been warned, seeing Young-Mi's disfigured face for the first time is disquieting...

 

... she'd even had drinks with the monster who had done this! ... Sun-Mi reminds herself ruefully ...

 

 

"What did I do, to deserve an audience with the Queen of MBS?" Young-Mi mocks, the words slurred by her facial paralysis. "Or did you just come to gloat?"

 

"What is there to gloat about?" Sun-Mi replies tiredly, unamused by the insinuation. "We're not competing anymore."

 

"Is Her Majesty magnanimous, now, above such petty trifles?" Young-Mi scoffs acidly. "Or are you ashamed because it's only by good luck that it's you, and not me?"

 

 

The accusation sets Sun-Mi's teeth on edge...

 

"After everything that's happened, is that all you still think about?" she reprimands Young-Mi harshly. "We both might've died!"

 

"If you're expecting gratitude for 'saving my life' just forget it... this is hardly what I'd call a life," Young-Mi snaps bitterly.

 

"I'm sorry for what happened," Sun-Mi extends compassion, "What you did was wrong, but you didn't deserve this."

 

But her sentiment is tossed back in her face...

 

"I don't need your pity!" Young-Mi retorts angrily. "Such useless tripe is wasting my valuable time!" she declares their meeting over.

 

 

Sun-Mi takes a deep breath to chill her reflexive impulse to snipe back...

 

"Please... stay and hear me out," she requests, sitting down to encourage Young-Mi's reciprocation ...

 

Reluctantly, but curious, Young-Mi takes the other chair. She sits stiffly erect, arms folded, glaring across the table, determined to yield nothing...

 

"What is it?" she asks sharply.

 

"I need your help against President Kim Eun-Ki," Sun-Mi states the reason she came. "Won't you reconsider, and testify for the Prosecution?"

 

"What's your beef with President Kim?" Young-Mi asks warily.

 

"The Prosecutor dropped sexual harassment case," Sun-Mi relates the changed situation.

 

"So?"

 

"For all those women's sake, Kim can't let get off free!" Sun-Mi states heatedly. "He needs to be stopped before he attacks again..."

 

Young-Mi's radar picks up a new signal...

 

"What aren't you telling me?" she asks, then guesses, "This isn't just about those other women, this is personal, isn't it?"

 

Sun-Mi looks away uneasily, deciding what to say or not say...

 

"Well, did something happen, or not?" Young-Mi prods rudely.

 

"What I tell you, must never be repeated," Sun-Mi requires, before revealing, "Kim Eun-Ki assaulted me sexually, in London..."

 

Tears smart in her eyes as she continues, "We were alone, there were no witnesses, so I have no proof, but it happened..."

 

 

At Sun-Mi's frank confession, Young-Mi's attitude changes...

 

"I believe you," she says supportively, "Because he came after me, too..."

 

She reaches over and takes Sun-Mi's hands. Feeling her trembling, she grasps them securely, lending her strength..

 

"Talk to me, I understand," she offers an empathetic ear.

 

 

Sun-Mi doesn't look up as she finally speaks, relating the incident...

 

"It was so humiliating... I'd thought I was strong, but I was so weak and useless... so scared he'd hurt me, I didn't resist, I couldn't say a word," she describes her failure to stop the assault.

 

"I can still feel his hands on me... touching me, grasping..."

 

She shudders with the memories, fighting back anguished tears. "I... I just let him do it... He said it was because in my heart, I was a slut... a whore... that I deserved it... wanted it..."

 

Feeling Sun-Mi trembling, Young-Mi grasps her hands tighter, lending her strength until Sun-Mi calms...

 

"Did he hurt you, physically?"

 

Sun-Mi shakes her head, "Only bruises."

 

"Did he rape you?" Young-Mi inquires gently.

 

Sun-Mi exhales a deep sigh, replying grimly, "He was about to... and would've succeeded, except for you..."

 

"Me?"

 

"He was gloating about his prowess... telling me how much 'fun' we were about to have..."

 

"That's when my mind cleared -- I remembered how you fought back against those ruffians -- and I found the courage to resist. Somehow, I fought him off, and escaped."

 

She looks up at Young-Mi gratefully, "I should have thanked you before. You're my life savior, again..."

 

"It wasn't me, you saved yourself," Young-Mi deflects the praise as unwarranted. "Does anyone else know about this?"

 

Sun-Mi shakes her head. "All I wanted to do was erase it from my mind... like it never happened."

 

"You didn't tell Mom or Dad?"

 

"I couldn't... It would devastate them," Sun-Mi replies. "Daddy would beat Kim Eun-Ki to death if he knew."

 

"You didn't even tell Min-Cho?"

 

"When Min-Cho -- and later, Uncle Sun-Dal -- asked questions, I told them about the attack, but said that I escaped untouched," Sun-Mi explains. "I didn't want anyone to know, because I felt so guilty, and ashamed."

 

"You've nothing to be ashamed of," Young-Mi declares. "It wasn't your fault. He's just a bastard!"

 

 

"Please, if you feel this way, won't you help me put the bastard away?" Sun-Mi appeals again.

 

Young-Mi shakes her head. "I can't... I'd have to testify in public."

 

"But otherwise, you're wasting your life in prison," Sun-Mi argues.

 

"Look at me, Jin Sun-Mi!" Young-Mi demands, "Can't you see? I'm a freak now! I have NO LIFE anymore."

 

Sun-Mi looks right back into Young-Mi's eyes as she answers...

 

"I don't see a freak. I see a strong, intelligent, talented woman, who is much more than just a pretty face," she declares sincerely. "I see a woman who was never held back by feeling sorry for herself, who fought tooth and nail against all odds to achieve her goals."

 

"Don't humor me!" Young-Mi rebuffs Sun-Mi's entreaty skeptically. "You know it's not the same now..."

 

"What I know is that you still have a lot to offer this world," Sun-Mi asserts, "and I know there are people who care about you... I care..."

 

"I've done everything I could to hurt you," she contends, unpersuaded. "You should hate me!"

 

"Yes... we've had our differences over the years. Been enemies, too," Sun-Mi acknowledges. "But like it or not, we're sisters now, and that will never change, so I can't hate you.... Let's stop fighting, and start helping each other," she appeals again.

 

"The past isn't so easily erased," Young-Mi continues to hold back. "Some things can't be forgiven..."

 

But Sun-Mi persists, "We all carry scars from the past -- some from our own fault, some from others, some just because of our circumstances -- but that's not a reason we can't move forward, if we choose."

 

She reaches out, and grasps Young-Mi's hands...

 

"I've made my choice. How about you?"

 

 

Young-Mi's frozen face shows no emotion as she reconsiders. Then tears appear in her eyes, and she manages to force a half-smile, the best that she can...

 

"Tsst! ... What choice? You're so obstinate!" Young-Mi jokes, though her voice is breaking. "But just so you know, I'm letting you win this time. Are you happy now?"

 

Sun-Mi nods, smiling wider. "Yes... very happy. I only wish it didn't have to come this far..."

 

 

In response, Young-Mi squeezes Sun-Mi's hands tighter...

 

"I'll help you stop Kim," she promises, "but there's something I need your help with, too..."